I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve bought a big bat. I’m all ready, you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!
I love this very much.
I love this very much.
Wow this is on point.
I was in a minor car accident yesterday - I was rear-ended by a college kid who was texting and driving (and tailgating and generally acting like an irresponsible loon). I dropped my car off at the auto body shop today and picked up a rental car, then began the laborious process of installing the kids’ monster space-rocket-sized Britax booster chairs into that rental car.
Seriously, they weigh like 100 pounds each or something.
It was about thirty seconds into this process that I realized how utterly disgusting their car seats are. Possibly they should be classified as biohazards. The combination of goldfish crackers, spilled apple juice, snow cone drippings, and Trader Joe’s Strawberry Snack Bars all somehow managed to combine into the most horrifying sticky ooey foul-smelling substance known to mankind. I honestly debated whether they were salvageable or whether they should be thrown directly into a landfill.
Of course, they cost about $300 each so I decided they should be saved. TWO HOURS LATER I have laundered the fabric covers and painstakingly handwashed the frames to remove 97% of the ooze. The other 3% is a permanent feature, I think, but at least I got the smell out.
Parenting is so ultra-glamorous.
Occasionally Matt will let the kids ride in the third row of his SUV for a quick spin around the neighborhood; they think this is great fun. Tonight while out to dinner, Tess befriended the older couple sitting next to us and told them, “Sometimes my daddy puts us in the trunk of his car and drives us around the block.”
I’m expecting Child Protective Services to knock on my door at any moment.
I can’t believe Tess is in Pre-K. I just can’t believe it. When I was on my way in to the school for pickup this afternoon I saw a friend of mine in the infants room, and stopped to talk to her for a few minutes. Then I just stared at the babies, thinking how it was just like three months or so ago that my Tess was a baby in diapers. I swear it was just like three months ago.
And now she is one of the big kids. She’s very pleased.
Over the past four months, theSkimm family has expanded from 2 to 7. With that growth, theSkimm kind of resembles the Duggar family. Minus Jim Bob.
We’ve learned that having a family is exhausting. Turns out people need to be managed and they don’t read your mind. While the latter is…
So, I kind of LOVE the Skimm girls. Everyone should follow them, and also subscribe to their email newsletter.
A friend of mine recently had her Tumblr hacked, which freaked me out. I’m moving the site over to a password-protected space and I’ll be taking down all the content from this URL shortly.
If you know me IRL and would like the new location and password, please shoot me an email or similar.
This morning, Tess used every single stall tactic in her Big Book of Preschooler Stalling Tactics to avoid leaving for school. I have no idea what prompted this desire to stay home, because she loves school and I generally have to drag her out of there. But for whatever reason - alignment of the moon? Warm weather? One shoe possibly not being perfectly comfortable? Who knows? - today was the day that she wanted to STAY HOME.
When Matt and I threatened to leave for work without her, thus leaving her home alone (and as a sidebar, this is the most idle threat of all time and the kids always know we are bluffing. why do we try this move?!), she doubled down. Instead of merely complaining about school, she threw herself over Trooper, who was napping sprawled across the living room floor per usual, and began sobbing that she couldn’t stand to leave her dog because she would miss him, “so, so much! I will cry all day!” Then she buried her face in his fur and continued weeping. ’ Trooper reacted to this outburst by barely looking up from his nap, then resuming snoring.
Matt and I did that thing where we tried really hard not to laugh, but quickly failed and ended up cracking up, which only ignited her rage. She turned bright red as she continued to sob/scream that we were the meanest mommy and daddy ever for making her leave the dog she loves. (Additional sidebar: I don’t even think she likes the dog very much. She sort of tolerates him until he steals her food, then she despises him.) We eventually ended up more or less forcing her into her car seat while she wept and rended her garments lamenting the cruel fate that had ripped her away from her beloved home and faithful canine.
Then we got two streets away from our house and she started singing along to the radio and became the most cheerful person on the planet.
She’s kind of a dramatic person, is what I’m saying. And the absolute conviction of her drama is the most impressive part. Bull-headed, adorable child.